After All This Time
by mulhollanddrivee
Summary: The months of emotional distress finally come to a halt; what could have been so much so sooner is within their grasp... It's now down to her to make the decision, act on the matter and give them everything they have wanted for so long. Kaitlyn/Seth Rollins. Features Roman Reigns.


Of all the various encounters and meetings that had happened during the past several months, none of them had ended quite like this. None of them had ended with her feeling like she did at that moment. It was as if everything that had happened, every innocent second of them being together had hit her harder than any way ever had. And right then, it had her questioning her entire future. Her feelings, her current relationship, _her life._

In her own mind, she insisted on going up there now to outright tell him that he had no right doing this to her; that he had no right to tell her the things he had done earlier that night... But most of all, that he had no right to make her feel the way she did about him. Not in this situation. However, while all that remained an issue for her, she knew that she was doing just the same to him. It killed her inside knowing how much pain she put him through, but she did it because she was a faithful person, and that would never change. In a situation like this, she was ironically hurting the person she was not in an intimate relationship with.

Ever since Kaitlyn had left the company she had continued going back maybe far too often to visit close friends. At least that's what she told herself and everyone else. When it came down to it, it was the former Shield member who garnered most of her time and attention when she was there. It was so weird. Her boyfriend would walking around whatever town RAW happened to be in that night whilst Kaitlyn would be in the arena, chatting with others. There were times when he would however come to the arena with her and talk with some of her friends. He got on well with them, and Natalya and Renee had told Kaitlyn quite a few times that he was a pleasant person and nice to be around. But those same two women knew exactly what was going on elsewhere.

While they were especially wary of Seth Rollins, Kaitlyn had confided in the two of them multiple times with the complicated situation and had found the trust in them by assuring the two women that there was nothing going on between them. Regardless of the Canadians believing and trusting her, the questions that popped up when discussing her friendship with Seth were "Is it us you're convincing, or yourself?" as well as, "You really think 'friends' is all it's going to be?"

Those were the questions that brought Kaitlyn's emotions right back to square one. Square one being the first time she had ever come across Seth, the first ever conversation and how well they bonded and got on. They had so much in common right from day one and they just felt right together. It was just never taken further and no one familiar with the situation understood why. Even Roman Reigns.

Sighing, the woman pushed herself up from leaning on the corners of the sink. She stared at the reflection that looked back at her, noting the mascara residue just under her eye. Frowning, she fished out a cotton bud from her bag, using the handy item to brush way the dark specs of make up. She disposed of it in the trash can at the side of her and looked back up, taking a deep breath.

It was around the time when she usually left the area to go back to living the life that wrestling wasn't a part of. Sometimes, honestly, she missed it a lot. Moving on was a smart decision on her part, it gave her time to grow and explore different aspects of her life and talents and she'd really enjoyed the experience so far.

After a little more thought and the repetition in her mind of what Seth had said to her earlier, she finally made her way back out into the halls. She knew it was time to face Seth about all of this. All signs and thoughts in her mind led back to him and it had really taken its toll on her over the months. Hell, over the years. It was approaching three years since they first became familiar of each other and to this day, not one bit of interest had been lost.

The woman continued walking, her mind set on getting back to where Seth was. She knew he would still be preparing for his match later in the night in his locker room - his very own locker room courtesy of The Authority. It was so strange seeing him without Dean and Roman by his side, though she had grown to adjust to it. He'd given her his reasons and she had understood, knowing his next path to success would have to be without them. She really did miss how things were, though, because even though she had mostly been around for Seth, the four of them used to hang out collectively and Kaitlyn grew very close to Roman, too. She still spoke to him regularly and he was one of the people she looked forward to seeing at shows.

Funnily enough, she found herself approaching that very man there and then. Smiling slightly at his presence, she tapped on the shoulder of the Samoan powerhouse who had his back to her. He looked to be waiting around. "Roman, hey," she greeted, her smile widening as the man turned quickly. He mimicked her smile when he saw who it was.

"Baby girl, whatcha hanging around here all alone for?" He clasped his hand around hers briefly and Kaitlyn did the same.

"Nothing, I was just... On my way back to Seth," she told him with a smile, moving a hand through the top part of her brown hair to tease in some volume.

Roman nodded, his thumbs hooking over the belt of his newly modified ring gear. "Things going good between the two of you? Any different?"

"They were actually going fine until tonight..."

"What do you mean?" Roman asked with concern. "What's he done to you?"

"No, nothing like that! He just... Tonight he told me that he cares a lot about me, and it... It hit hard for some reason."

"Man," the man shook his head and chuckled. "I'll never understand how the two of you never had something. Well, you do have something and it's pretty big, so why do I feel like the right thing isn't being done about it?"

"Because. Relationship."

The man suddenly gave her a look, and it was a look that made her feel slightly uncomfortable. It was a look she knew would follow with him telling her to give up her relationship, she just knew it. He sniggered. "Beats me how you've maintained a healthy relationship alongside a friendship with a man who's crazy about you. He's good to you, ain't he?"

"Never once tried anything when he found out I has something going on," she looked down, her smile vanishing. "It kills me doing this to him," she told him quietly, Kaitlyn then looking up at her long time friend. "But I want him too. I don't want anyone else and I don't know how to handle it."

"Go and get him. Whatever you have now is worth letting go of and you can't tell me I'm wrong. Hell, you're with him all the damn time," he chuckled, earning a smile back from the former Diva.

"Damn it, Roman, you gotta quit slapping me with the truth."

"Someone's gotta."

She didn't skip the chance to give him her infamous eye roll. The damn man was always right and he was her own personal agony aunt by his own accord. It was both a blessing and a curse. "You're too amazing, you know?"

"And so are you. For Seth, especially. Don't you ever let yourself forget that, 'aight?"

While she wanted to laugh all the same, she also wanted to groan at the man's words. "I miss you guys together so much. Still hurts, you know?"

"Does for me, too," he frowned. "Maybe one day Seth might find his chill. In fact, if he had you, he probably would, so think of it that way. You may rekindle a bond whilst strengthening another."

"It's definitely a priority of mine, you know that for sure."

"Get started now."

Kaitlyn nodded, reaching up to give Roman a hug, the man returning the gesture and tightening his arms around her. She stepped back, taking a deep breath and looking at the Samoan like she was expecting an answer to every problem she had ever experienced.

"Go. Now."

* * *

Looking up at the door of Seth's locker room had her stomach somersaulting like never before, turning back was not an option, not at all after the talk she just had with the man's former best friend. Closing her eyes tightly together, she gave her usual knock. She knew that Seth was aware of who was on the other side of the door.

There was a pause, though to her it felt like a lifetime. The woman's eyes shot back open as the door slowly opened steadily, revealing a more surprised Seth Rollins than anything else. He cleared his throat slightly and began talking with a quiet tone. "Kait, what are you doing back here? I thought you left half an hour ago?"

"Could I come in?"

"Sure," he managed, his expression growing more concerned as the brunette slowly walked in, her hands finding the edge of the door and closing it behind her. "What's going on?"

"I... I need you to tell me things. I came here for answers but I don't know where at all to start."

"Uh huh, and what's that regarding?" He gestured that she sit down with him and she did so, following him onto the bench.

Her eyes met his brown ones - the eyes that, to her, couldn't show any signs of him being a bad person if they tried. "Us."

"Us," he repeated. His voice was unsteady, she noticed. "Wouldn't know where to start."

"Please talk to me, Seth. Earlier, when you said you cared about me... Yeah, I know you do, and I care about you and all that gibberish, but, I don't know. I took it differently. Maybe I'm overreacting..."

"You're not." He brought his gaze up to fix hers and the woman looked at him with her nerves on edge and her throat almost closed up. Seth continued to stay silent, his head falling into his hands, the man dragging them over his head and to the back of his neck. "I can't talk to you like this. I can't tell you these things."

"We're compatible, Seth. You can tell me anything in that crazy mind of yours."

"I can't. It won't do either of us good."

She bit the inside of her lip, the woman damn near ready to run a mile in her chunky heels after saying what she then let out. "I'm not happy right now, and it's because after all this time I've denied myself of what I truly want."

His head could not have physically shot up faster if he tried. Regardless of that being all he could ever want to hear from her, the stiff expression he held softened and his head fell back against the wall behind him. "Please don't do this to me."

"Talk to me, Seth."

He stayed quiet yet again, this time for much longer than a minute or so. He stayed in the same position, his eyes lazily moving over what was in front of him. Kaitlyn gave him this time, she knew he would say something soon, he just needed time to think of how to put it into the right words. So she waited. All the time not moving her gaze from him for a second. She watched his chest rise and fall as his breathing became slower and slower.

After a few minutes, he finally lifted his head to look at her. He smiled, but it felt disingenuous, and she figured it was to make her feel less worried about what he was going to say. "You know that I care about you more than anyone, right? You've... Always been there. And I feel like you always will." Kaitlyn nodded at his words, and his eyes fell back to the floor.

"No, look at me."

"I can't. Whatever I say, it doesn't make a difference," he shrugged. "Doesn't matter."

"It does to me. Everything that's ever happened between us; all the time we've spent together - it matters to me. And it's important that you tell me if all of this, us, is worth it."

He looked up again to meet her eyes, and his brows furrowed at how lost they looked, all because he refused to let out the emotion she was asking for. He was stubborn when it came to letting his guard down, both of them knew that. "Worth what?"

"Giving up what I have to be with you."

"You're not, alright?" The man got to his feet looking like he wanted to throw something at the wall. His arms came up as his hands regained their firm grip in his hair.

Her heart wrenched for him. The woman wanted so much to comfort him; to hold him, but she couldn't. At least, not at that moment in time. But she knew that time was all down to the decision she made and she couldn't stand it anymore. She couldn't stand watching him fall apart in front of her because he knew he had to keep so much locked inside and it was all because of her relationship with someone else. She couldn't help but wonder about all the possible things he could have told Roman. She knew it had to have been intimate considering how insistent Roman was that they should be together. And it made her want Seth more.

"You can't fuck me around like this. You can't expect me to believe you're willing to give up your entire relationship, your entire future for me. You just... You can't put those 'what could be' thoughts in my head. You have no right to do that, alright?" His breathing came so short and quick, every word spoken coming with a broken voice. Kaitlyn had never seen him like this around her before and it was crushing.

"I want you to give me a reason why I should."

"You want a reason? You want me to stand here and try to think up a few reasons as to why you should be with me?" He came closer to her in almost a stealth manner, but she wasn't intimidated. She knew he wouldn't touch her.

"How about because it's always me you come to see? Because it's me that you can talk to about anything and nothing for hours on end, is that it?" He shook his head, chuckling briefly. "Want the truth?" He wanted to know, and Kaitlyn could just about bring out a nod, her attention completely transfixed on how this was affecting everything from his body language to his tone of voice.

"It kills me. It kills me knowing that there's someone else that gets to spend more time with you than I do. And that same person gets to hold you, to kiss you, to touch you. It makes me sick to my stomach, you know?" He cleared his throat, taking his strong gaze away from her and letting it roam around him. "It's always been you, I've said it since day one, that'll never change. There's half of your reason, there's no use in me wasting my energy on the rest, only for you to turn away and go back to him."

"It'll be over. Tonight. I've made my decision, I just came here looking for confirmation from you. Don't shoot me down like this, Seth. You have every right to get mad; every right to tell me I'm crazy for just dumping some guy you're adamant I have a future with for you, whatever. But that is not how it is. The only person I see a future with is you. And if I can't have that, then I guess that's it for me. You are half of this problem, you think it's not hard for me, too? To leave you every week?" She ignored the tears in her eyes and snatched her purse back up with intentions of leaving.

"Kaitlyn..."

She stopped, her back to him and her eyes closed, waiting for whatever response he had to give. Seth Rollins said nothing, only walking up towards her slowly, the man wrapping his arms tightly around her and letting his head fall onto her shoulder near the crook of her neck. The contact was the thing the two of them felt they needed the most and it was finally happening. He stayed there with her, not loosening the tight grip he had. Shortly after, Kaitlyn's hands came to rest on the ones holding her and her head rolled over only slightly, bringing it closer to Seth's.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Seth asked, lifting his head to find her eyes.

"I am."

"Will he be okay?"

"We're good with each other. We're friends. That's all it will ever feel like. He's a great person and I know he'll understand. I hope. So I have to go and do it now."

Seth knew they wouldn't end on bad terms, Kaitlyn was just too nice to let that happen and she was definitely stubborn until she got her way of making people see the brighter side of bad situations. That was just her. Seth liked to think he understood her more than anyone else, even her closest friends.

She maneuvered herself out of his grasp and continued for the door, looking back just before leaving as Seth called her name once again.

"You know that I don't want us to rush into anything, right? I want to give you everything I have, but at your pace. You know where I am when it's all said and done, don't you?"

"I do. It's not long now," she told him, smiling back at the grin that lit up his face. "I'll see you tonight."

He simply nodded, knowing there was nothing else to be said until this was out of the way. Oh, there definitely was a lot to discuss, he thought.


End file.
